Everything about The Sirius Cybernetics Corporation totally explained
The
Sirius Cybernetics Corporation is a
fictional company from
Douglas Adams'
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
The Corporation
In the series, the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation is responsible for the design and creation of a wide range of
robots and labour-saving devices, such as
lifts,
automatic doors,
ventilation systems, the infamous
Nutrimatic Drink Dispenser, and
digital watches (substituted by
polyphonic ringtones,
palmtops and
computer operating systems in the
2005 radio series).
Despite the fact that the "fundamental design flaws are completely hidden by their superficial design flaws" of everything they produce, the
marketing-driven company will still exist until a revolution in the next thousand years. When a person asks for a drink from the
Nutrimatic Drink Dispenser, the dispenser probes the customer's taste sensors and pleasure receptors of the brain. Despite its sophisticated artificial intelligence, it always dispenses the same drink: a concoction that tastes "
almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea".
Genuine People Personalities
The Sirius Cybernetics Corporation invented a concept called
Genuine People Personalities ("GPP") which imbue their products with intelligence and emotion. Thus not only do doors open and close, but they thank their users for using them, or sigh with the satisfaction of a job well done. Other examples of Sirius Cybernetics Corporation's record with sentient technology include an armada of neurotic elevators, hyperactive ships' computers and perhaps most famously of all,
Marvin the Paranoid Android. Marvin is a
prototype for the GPP feature, and his depression and "terrible pain in all the
diodes down his left side" are due to unresolved flaws in his programming. Ironically, the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation defines a robot as "your plastic pal who's fun to be with".
The
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy electronic guidebook defined the Marketing Division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation as "a bunch of mindless jerks who'll be the first up against the wall when the revolution comes" with "a footnote to the effect that the editors would welcome applications from anyone interested in taking over the part of robotics correspondent." The story notes that a version of the
Encyclopaedia Galactica that "had the good fortune to fall through a time warp from a thousand years in the future" defined the Marketing Division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation as "a bunch of mindless jerks who were the first against the wall when the revolution came."
The only profitable division of the company is its Complaints division, which, according to the series, takes up all of the major landmasses on the first three planets in the Sirius
Tau system. The theme song for the Complaints division is
Share and Enjoy, and has since become the theme apparent for the company as a whole. The main office building and headquarters for the company was originally built to represent this motto, but due to bad architecture it sank into the ground, killing many talented young complaints associates. The downside to this is that the building now read, in the dialect of the planet it was on, "Go Stick Your Head in a Pig."
By-products of Designer People
In addition, during the backstory
Young Zaphod Plays it Safe, the corporation designed and produced synthetic personalities to order, but they turned out to be the "By-products of Designer People - amalgams of characteristics which simply couldn't co-exist in naturally occurring life forms". Some of these were dangerous as they didn't alarm people to their dangerousness. The starship
Billion Year Bunker contained three of these in the hold, on their way to being blasted out of the universe - but one had escaped to Earth, "the man babbling gently about a shining
city on a hill" (an open reference to
Ronald Reagan).
Further Information
Get more info on 'Sirius Cybernetics Corporation'.
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